The Self-Deception of Control

When deep into the addiction cycle, the drugs or alcohol and habitual use consume all rational thinking. Despite appearances contrary to the fact, the addict believes they have “it” under control while their life spirals in a downward trajectory. It’s hard, even sad, to watch a loved one transform into a warped version of themselves, unable to deal with reality. Addicts are experts at justifying their habits, even if internally, they often wonder about quitting. Between the physical dependency, the mental and emotional self-deception and spiritual emptiness, the addict returns to what they know numbs them. They press “pause” on reality, as their problems snowball in the background. In the moments between using, the ability to face their circumstances sober seems too tall a task to attempt. It’s much, much easier to escape with substances than deal with life -- at least that’s what they believe.

But hope remains, even if hope feels lost as their world crumbles around them. Some wait for the inevitable “rock bottom,” others are forced into recovery and others flip the light switch before complete darkness arrives. Regardless of how they arrive, a new life awaits -- one day at a time. It’s a different storm that starts fiercely but dissipates gradually. One that faces reality, and eventually learns to endure the elements while enjoying the new season.

Reflection Questions

How would you describe your mindset while deep in your addiction? 

How many times did you wonder about, or even try, to get sober? Why didn’t you?

How did your addiction put yourself and/or others in danger?

Why didn’t these potentially fatal consequences change your behavior?